Tuesday, December 30, 2014

No, please, not the SLIPPERS!

I'm just going to come right out and say it. Pajamas should not be worn at the grocery store. I'm really just tired of it.

Now I am not in any way saying that you need to be in full hair and make-up to purchase your groceries. I am frequently straight from the gym sweaty, so I will apologize for any possible stinkyness. I do always put on a clean dry shirt, not the nasty thermal top with the grungy cuffs that I have been wearing to sleep in, as well as actual running tights or yoga pants not the pink plaid flannel with the filthy hems where they have been dragging on the ground, and shoes.

Yes, shoes I say, shoes with soles on them that are designed to be worn outside. I know our society has gotten overly casual as far as clothing and shoes are concerned, but please, I'm actually pleading now, begging.  I am tired of seeing everyones' slippers at the grocery store!

I will admit to germaphobic tendencies, but nothing incapacitating. I do believe however that some things should stay at home and once out of the home can no longer serve in their previously assigned position.

Slippers should be worn in your own residence, or packed in your suitcase for a trip and worn in other peoples residences, once they have gone to the store, work, school, the airport, Target their work as slippers is over. They can now live in the garage for taking out garbage and getting the mail, or they can go to slipper heaven. (The garbage can)

Similarly, pajamas should be worn in your home and in your bed, or packed in your suitcase for a trip and worn elsewhere mostly surrounding the bedtime hour possibly to watch TV, a movie, eat some dessert on the couch, play cards or a board game, you get the idea.  Again once the pajamas have gone to the grocery store, the mall, the post office, Starbucks, school, work they have lost their pajama status and should no longer be worn to bed.

But really I think the issue is a total lack of pride.  Have some pride people! Is that hard to pull on some yoga pants (I'm being generous here, I really wanted to say jeans, but I know some of you are not 'jean' people) and a tee shirt.  Put your hair in a messy bun (they are in now), or a ball cap, a pony, a stocking hat, anything. Lastly some SHOES.  I will even go so far as to say athletic slides or flip flops, just please for the love of God, not the slippers.

Thursday, December 4, 2014

Am I crazy or is it just me?

Last winter we were having one of those evenings where homework and/or sports practices were done before the dinner hour and if all the stars were aligned we could get home and have dinner together. One of those evenings where you just want to get home and hunker down for the night, slippers, pjs, maybe a blanket on the couch.  The kids had even gone so far as to be in pjs at the table.  Now when it comes to pajamas, we are a flannel bottoms, any kind of long sleeve tee on top family and as far as I am concerned if everyone is wearing a bottom and top I'm good.  So what if the kids have their shirts inside out?  They are just pajamas right?  Apparently this is a hot button topic for my husband, undiscovered by me in the last 23 years of marriage. We sat down to eat, something warm on a cold night I think, baked pasta or chili, who knows it's not really the point. He looks around the table, two kids have wet hair from the shower. Now this in and of itself is not a deal breaker, the problem was the hair is not combed, so as the hygiene lecture insued he then realized that one had their shirt on backwards, the other completely inside out. With that we were off to the races with the kids and I looking bewildered, my husband looking at us like we were bordering on the insane.

After dinner was over and cleared away, I finally got around to getting into my own pjs.  My husband was going to head out to the gym. We met in the kitchen for a debrief of the next day since I was headed to bed.  I started the rundown of who had to be where and when, when I realized he was silently staring at me. "What?" I said.  "REALLY?" he said. I was stumped. "What?" "YOUR SHIRT IS ON INSIDE OUT!" As I started to laugh hysterically, tears running down my face, he said, "Sometimes I really think I am the ONLY sane person in this family!"

Fast forward to this morning as I am trying to leave the house.  I need to leave by 6am to get a coffee and get to work. Now I can leave at 630, but subjecting the general population to me at 7am without the benefit of coffee is not all together a good idea. As I prepared to be on my way my car keys were no where to be found. I knew I had put them in my purse with my phone after walking the dog the night before. Now the panic is setting in, can't find the keys, the possibility of coffee is rapidly diminishing, my husband and oldest boy are headed out of town, I need to go to WORK! People need to got to school the day must begin.  With a household search in progress the 10 year old admits he had gone out to the car the night before.

#1 He went in my purse. Off limits for everyone.
#2 He let us all run around searching for a good 20 minutes before coming up with that revelation.
#3 He does not know where the keys are! AAaaahhhhhhh!

Long story short the keys were in the living room on the coffee table.  No I did not leave them there!
As I explained to the kids they may enjoy running around the house in the morning like their hair is on fire, looking for things that their father and I have repeatedly asked them to set out for the next day. I however do not enjoy starting the day that way. It tends to make me cranky. I am doing just fine going crazy on my own time line.  I really don't need extra help with that!